CHICAGO — Nobody likes you when you're 23, but everyone likes you when you're 31, according to a study that caught one of our editors' eye Thursday. Check out that and more great reads from about the web, including an alarming finding about beard cleanliness and a scandalous laptop accessory.
Now That's How You Celebrate Teacher Appreciation Week: Whilst Chicago Public Schools was proposing a seven percent pay cut to the city's educators during Teacher Appreciation Week (oh no you didn't), Stephen Colbert — not be be confused with "Stephen Colbert" — took a different tack. According to reports shared via Daily Kos, Colbert personally funded, to the tune of $800,000, every single Donors Choose request posted by South Carolina public school teachers. Reporter Patty Wetli would like to see Karen Lewis' response to that.
But I'm feelin' 22: Senior editor Andrew Herrmann (that's his title, not a reflection of his age, BTW), is reading about a survey of 100 people who are 100 years old. Reflecting back, they say the most attractive age was 31, the happiest was 44, the wisest was 49 and the most content was 56. The UnitedHealthCare survey also queried 100 ten-year-olds and found both the seniors and the kids name their mothers as their top role models. But when asked what celebrity they would most likely want to eat dinner with, the centenarians said Betty White while the kids said Taylor Swift. Of course, two-thirds of the elders said who's Taylor Swift, anyway? Ew.
[Getty Images/Jemal Countess]
Poop in Your Beard: A pseudoscience story has gone viral about how beards are full of poop and as filthy as a toilet seat. Sam Cholke is reading Slate's refutation of the whole idea and reminding us that everything is covered with germs. If beards are full of poop particles, then just about everything is — deal. (And maybe double check to make sure the kitchen staff at your favorite eatery are donning the proper protective gear.)
USB Humping Dog: Sometimes it really is the simple things in life that make every day worth living, like this USB Humping Dog. This beagle ($20.97) plugs into a your USB port and goes to town, according to its description on Amazon.com.
And as funny as that may sound on its own, reporter Howard Ludwig recommends you read the reviews. Some people are barking because this dog isn't actually a usable storage device. Others have even better things to say.
"Rex doesn't hump the USB port; he makes sweet love to it. With each electronic thrust the passion and heat of metal-on-metal friction builds," says one four-star review.
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