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Is Running Into The Tamale Guy a Religious Experience? Yes, Yelpers Say

By Kyla Gardner | April 14, 2015 5:49am

CHICAGO — Do not confuse him with the Tamale Man of L.A. or Tamale Lady of San Francisco.

He is not Tamale Boy (a restaurant, not a boy) in Portland.

He is Chicago's very own ...TAMALE GUY!

In this edition of Chicago Reviewed, we see what Yelpers have to say about the services of Claudio Velez, aka local celeb The Tamale Guy.

Kyla Gardner says there are tamale guy impostors out there:

The Tamale Guy earned 4.5 out of 5 stars from 286 reviews.

   (Facebook/The Tamale Guy)

All reviews credited to Yelp, and may be partial.

Most Yelpers find meeting The Tamale Guy to be a religious experience.

Like, REALLY religious.

Or REALLY drunk. More drinks = more stars.

Think of all the people who didn't know where or how OR that it even happened. All those Yelp reviews, lost to impaired memories.

The creation of a Tamalderman position could only improve local politics.

A TAMALDERMAN FOR EVERY WARD!

Anyone who regularly deals with drunk people at their job a saint.

OK, this forum is NOT to discuss whether or not you like tamales overall. This is helpful to no one. "If you don't like tamales, you probably won't like these tamales." THANKS. This is like when people review an electric toothbrush on Amazon and give it one star even though "it's literally the best thing ever" and "it changed my life" BUT "my dog died on the same day it arrived so I think of my dead dog whenever I use it so one star." DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND THE PURPOSE OF REVIEWS?

You're at a loud bar, Mr. Eloquent. "Movie Theaters: One star, because I have to be quiet."

This is fair.

Do not forget to pack crisp fivers for a night out on the Near West Side, friends.

What is a car if not a large tamale cooler on wheels? (P.S. The MySpace page no longer exists, but you can track The Tamale Guy through this crowd-sourced Twitter account.)

He's The Tamale Guy this city deserves AND needs right now. Like right now. Rainbo Club, anyone?

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