"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet." — William Shakespeare
SOLDIER FIELD — On Wednesday, Bears quarterback Jay Cutler and his fashionista wife, Kristin Cavallari, became the proud parents of son No. 2.
They named their boy Jaxon Wyatt, which could be the most popular, trendy and badass name in America.
"Basically, it's the sort of name that says, 'I want my son to be cool, so I'm going to pick the trendiest name out there and trick out the spelling,' " said author Bruce Lansky, the nation's foremost expert on baby names.
In 2013, the name "Jackson" was all the rage with new parents, according to BabyCenter.com, which ranked it No. 1 on its annual Top 100 list of baby names.
"And boy names with an 'X' in them are hot, hot, hot. They lend a macho vibe to a name," Lansky said. "That makes Jaxon a cooler, trendier and more macho name."
Oh, and that's not a compliment, said Lansky, who praised the Cutlers on the name of their first son, Camden.
"Camden's a place name after the dopey city in New Jersey and not a glamorous place," he said. "That makes it interesting. I give Kristin credit."
But Jaxon is another story, according to the baby name guru.
"Jackson is strictly a trendy thing, and Jaxon is even more flippin' trending. It's a fashionista name," he said. "Jackson means 'Jack's son.' If your father's name isn't Jack, then it's stupid."
"Stupid" might be the right word for some of Cutler's play-calling choices, but that's kind of harsh when we're talking baby names, even for me.
Still, picking apart celebrity baby names has become something of an American pastime — like baseball for gossip readers and TMZ followers. Apparently, it's become acceptable to heckle anything these days, even a newborn baby's name.
So, I continued on and asked Lansky about the Cutler boy's middle name, "Wyatt."
"Wyatt's a gunslinger's name. Like Wyatt Earp and the shootout at the OK Corral," Lansky said. "Super macho."
Lansky said he has figured out a system to determine a coolness quotient of sorts to rank how cool a baby's name is.
"For boys, it's a name that has action in it, like Chase and Hunter, or has some violence, like Remington, which is the name of a gun," Lansky said. "So, Wyatt is cool."
In fact, the name Wyatt is tied with Jett for No. 6 on his "cool names for boys" list, which ranks Levi, Nico and Remington at the top.
"So they've got a cool middle name, a trendy, hot first name with a macho spelling," Lansky said. "I'll tell you what it is, it's an attempt to set a new world record in macho baby name trendiness."
And if that's the case, I can't think of a single reason to fault the proud parents for that — even if the elder gunslinger in the family hasn't gotten the Bears to the Super Bowl, yet.
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