Michelle Tomko, 44, was eating brunch the Sunday before last when she saw on the restaurant's TV reports of the mass shooting in Orlando, Florida, that claimed 49 lives at a gay nightclub earlier that morning.
The Atlantic City-based comic's first thought was that the news had been mistakenly reported.
Tomko, who identifies as a lesbian, later reflected on all the times she'd been at a nightclub in the wee hours: "At 2 o’clock in the morning, everybody has their guard down," she said.
As research for an article, Bobby Hankinson, 30, had visited six New York City gay bars the evening before the massacre. Soon after the news broke, he got a text from his mother insisting he renounce his career as a gay stand-up comedian.
"It was so weird to wake up the next morning having been in that space and understanding the importance of that space, and then seeing that violated right away," he recalled.
Jes Tom, 25, a queer, non-binary comedian who lives in Astoria, woke up two days after a difficult breakup to read Twitter updates about the hate crime. Those tweets almost made them (Tom's preferred non-gendered pronoun) reconsider the set they were scheduled to perform at an LGBT homeless shelter that evening.
"I spent all day completely despondent and just crying and being really upset and feeling like it was going to be way too hard to do this show," Tom said.
All three comics are performing at LGBTQ-centric comedy events over the next few days as part of New York City's Pride Week, and none are afraid for their safety, they said.
”I moved to New York right after 9/11," said Tomko, the Ohio-born headliner of two shows at the Broadway Comedy Club and the Greenwich Village Comedy Club featuring LGBTQ performers, "and just immediately to squelch any kind of fear I had about that, I thought to myself ... I could get hit by a bus in Cleveland for having not gone to New York. So I’m not cancelling shows."
In the current political climate in the U.S., anyone can be a target of mass violence, Hankinson said ruefully, "so if it happens to me while I’m being super gay on stage, I’m OK with that."
In fact, Hankinson feels compelled at this juncture to amplify his community's voice even more at Tomko's Sunday night show and his own storytelling, comedy and open-mic event Thursday night at The Unicorn in Chinatown.
"There’s a creation process that’s really inherent to this community and how we respond to a lot of the struggle and the hurt ... so it inspires me to make more art and do more writing and things like that."
For Tom, who has made several professional appearances since June 11, the Orlando shooting has raised the stakes for performances.
"It means that my job making sure that everyone is having a good time is that much more important," said Tom, who feels responsible for relieving, temporarily, an audience's troubles.
But navigating a comedic performance after a shock of Orlando proportions is a delicate matter, all three comics granted.
"It’s about finding ways to acknowledge it without gouging people open," Tom said. At a benefit for the lesbian political action committee LPAC last Thursday, the comedian prefaced a set of typically lighthearted autobiographical material by explaining that one way of coping with the tragedy is talking about themselves.
”I have never liked to gloss over things or pretend things don’t exist," said Tomko, whose Thursday showcase will be her first-ever NYC Pride Week event. "I never leave an elephant un-petted in a room. I probably will mention it, but I’m not going to do 10 minutes of jokes about it."
Looking for comics who identify as LGBTQ to book for his "Kweendom" show, a monthly event usually listed as comedy, Hankinson left room for emotions of all kinds to make their appearance: "I'm just honestly unsure what the tone is going to be," he wrote in an email message he shared with DNAinfo New York. "It's such a weird time to have an LGBTQ show, so I want to be sure we make space for folks who want to laugh or share or just hang out."
As host, Hankinson will lead an evening that both pays respectful tribute to the Pulse nightclub victims and gives attendees, who may participate in an open mic, the permission to heal and laugh.
Tom may not be an emcee this week, but they are just as invested in the idea of creating a collective safe safe space for every segment of the LGBTQ community, or "communities":
"This is awfully earnest for a stand-up comic, but ... I think it’s more important now than ever that we really recognize our differences and recognize our diversity and just be kind to each other, and take the extra step to be there for each other and be there for our friends.”
Some LGBTQ-centric comedy shows happening this week:
► A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to Pride!
Where: The Broadway Comedy Club, 318 W. 53rd St., Midtown; The Greenwich Village Comedy Club, 99 MacDougal St.
When: Thursday at 10 p.m. and Sunday, 7:30 p.m.
Michelle Tomko, who "pulls her humor from everyday observations and classic stories of family, travel, pets and where she puts herself on the LGBT spectrum," according to her website, is the headliner at these shows. On Thursday, Jes Tom will join her. On Sunday, Hankinson and Tom will perform. Tickets costs $10 online and $20 at the door, with a two-drink minimum.
Where: The Unicorn, 105 Henry St., Chinatown
When: Thursday, 8 p.m.
Bobby Hankinson hosts this evening of LGBTQ comedy, storytelling and open-mic contributions, held in a "space literally filled with Unicorns and rainbows," as the Facebook event page describes it. On the lineup: Drae Campbell, Desmond Thorne and Molly Horan. The suggested donation is $10, money that will go to the victims of the Orlando shooting.
► Exxon and Bud Light Lime Present: THANK Goddess PRIDE
Where: Over the Eight, 594 Union Ave., Williamsburg
When: Friday, 8 to 11 p.m.
Jes Tom is one of four stand-up comedians competing for the title of "J.P. Morgan Chase Bank Queer Artist in Residency" at this queer/feminist show hosted by Joe Castle Baker and Tessa Skara. A donation of $5 is suggested and proceeds will go to Pulse.
Where: The Broadway Comedy Club, 318 W. 53rd St., Midtown
When: Friday, 10 p.m. to midnight.
This show, hosted by comedian Sophia Nurse, features Janice Danielle, Rich Kiamco, Abby Deely, Kevin Dolan, Exiene Lungren and Jourdain Searles. As is the case with all shows at the Broadway Comedy Club, there's a two-drink minimum.
Where: People's Improv Theater, 123 E. 24th St., Gramercy
When: Friday, 8 p.m. to Sunday, 8:30 p.m.
The People's Improv Theater welcomes comedy lovers to Pride Weekend's unofficial LGBTQ comedy festival. QueerCom is three days of everything from improv to drag to full-length musicals. Festival tickets are $40.
